NOT SO BRITE LITES

I'm grateful to Andrew Ferguson for his reflection in Liberty (Moonland security, April 2007) reminding me about the story of moronic public officials and finger-wagging reporters caught up in the Great Lite Brite Scare. Peter Berdovsky and Sean Stevens planted little LED light displays around Boston as part of a marketing campaign for a television program. Boston's famously expensive and ridiculous reaction to these harmless illuminations made me cringe.

Then, God bless them, Berdovsky and Stevens, out on bail after having been arrested for I can't imagine what gave an illuminating press conference. At the conference they said that they were there to talk about hairstyles of the 70s. Whenever a reporter asked an impertinent 'question', such as, "you seem not to be taking this seriously," they would reply, "I'm sorry, but that's not a hair question."
Brilliant! This exchange was precious: reporter (to the guys' lawyer): "Have they been advised to act like they're not taking this seriously?"

Berdovsky's answer was, "That's ALSO not a hair question."

More of that please! When did the tone of public life become so damned righteous, officious, and petty?

Next time someone asks you a stupid question, in honor of Berdovsky and Stevens, just say, "That's not a hair question."

Here's a little update, based on a bunch of sloppy online research that I did:

One blogger reported that, at the press conference, Berdovsky said, "We need some time to really sort things out and, you know, figure out our response to this situation in other ways than talking about hair. So if you could just give us some privacy for a little bit. ... I will be trying to make sense of all it real soon."

Police in New York, where someone placed similar toys, got a list of locations from the marketing firm that Berdovsky and Stevens worked for. Almost all of the little gadgets were gone, apparently stolen, before the police could confiscate them. And, predictably, the little devices are selling for thousands on Ebay.

Laser graffiti artists in the Netherlands lit up a big building with "Free Berd," short for Free Berdovsky. Wow! Stevens and Berdovsky tweaked the media and the city of Boston and inspired the Dutch to humor. Is there anything they can't do? Hey, wait a minute! That's not a hair question.